musings of wrath

I haven’t hit the LJ since the end of August or so, and just started going through the Friends page, and saw a lot of posts concerning 9/11.

Usually, on such events, I’ve got a plethora of things to say.

I didn’t have much to say about the just-ending day. If you’re wondering why I say it that way, it’s because I haven’t gone to sleep yet. Yet.

On the 11th, I lost an old friend, he was on the top floor of the three floors that were destroyed by the impact of the second plane hitting the Trade Center towers. We hadn’t talked much, other than the “are you still alive?” emails we sent once every couple of months. I hadn’t seen him since October of ‘96. No, it wasn’t a Camarilla event, for those who might ask, this was before I started gaming. He had his hair long, then, but it was cropped short a month or so before he died, having landed a new job with some financial corporation as their technical lead. His mother was kind enough to send me a photograph.

I wanted to be in NYC today, visiting with old mutual friends and his family, but I couldn’t make it for financial reasons. Even if the temporary job hadn’t ended 2 weeks ago, I wouldn’t have had the stability to make a trip like that.

Harry was one of those guys who didn’t give in to the arrogance that our “circle” tended to fall towards. I’d like to think of myself as the same, but I know I wasn’t always the nicest to be around in that group. To him, however, everyone deserved a shot, and if they didn’t know a subject, they could always be taught. Frustration didn’t exist, to him. The “student” would often give up before he did.

Harry was creative, too. He did some awesome sketch work, from what I’d seen in the past, and I’d asked him before, why he didn’t do it for a living. Not enough money, he’d say.

I’m not faulting his decision, but it’s kind of ironic, really, that it was his desire for a comfortable life that ended it, in a way. If he’d gone with selling or publishing his art, he might not have been in the buildings that day.

On the opposite end, he might have been on one of those planes, flying to LA - one never knows.

Listening to the radio throughout the day, I’m still hearing one thing that was around a year ago - anger. The hate - the bad emotion - has faded somewhat, but lingers with some.

It’s alright to be angry, but hate isn’t necessary.

I’m not religious, but I thought of these words, based on what a good friend of mine, a Muslim, said:

“God, no matter what name you give him, cries equally for all of his children.”

Today, I cried for a friend; today, most of this nation cried for their brothers and sisters, mothers and fathers, and even their children.

Let us hope we never have to go through this again.

Mike,
You said a mouthful. Thank you. I am sorry for your loss. I to lost a friend in that fiasco. I think you said what most of us have tried desparately to express.

Meika

*hugs*

“God, no matter what name you give him, cries equally for all of his children.”

I said just about exactly that in the ritual I did last night.